A Plethera of Emotions...

Ok, so I knew there would be many ups and downs, good days and bad days...After all, isn't life like that?...a roller-coaster?

First, I want to preface this and say that I wouldn't change any of this for the world. Every emotion, every tear, every smile, every confusing email is SO worth it in the end! An end that will see me as a Mommy, at last, a precious little guy together with his forever family. I'd walk on hot coals for this little man...I'd walk to the ends of the earth for him. I'd labor everyday in hot cotton fields (and everyone KNOWS that's not what I describe as a 'yippee fun kind of day!' To be so in love with such an angel that's so far away...To have the future be so uncertain is terrifying...but all worth it!

Now...I'm not anti-American...not in the least!! I consider myself to be very Patriotic!! I'm proud of where I live! I'm so very thankful for those that have fought for the laws and rights that I have!!!
But sometimes, especially recently, I wonder what kind of loons we have making so-called 'laws'?? The laws I'm referring to are the 'laws' that have to do with international adoption...I know I'm not the most schooled on this subject...basically, I'm just frustrated with the whole DNA crap that's going on...

It seems really simple in my very simple mind that if one was to get DNA on said child and birthmother, that that DNA test would be done at time of relinquishment/abandonment...NOT after said child was already referred to a family...
After that family had fallen in love with said child!! After that mother of that family spends almost every night, rocking in the rocking chair that is in his nursery, dreaming of those nights that she is going to rock him to sleep!
I keep thinking to myself that I'm missing something...something somewhere in all this mess...something that would make sense to me! but I've read all those 'memos', I've called and cried to others that understand it more...
but the bottom line is...Why allow families to fall in love with those children that they are going through all this mess for, just to be told that those same children have to go through a DNA test, as well as the birth parent(s) must be found, DNA tested, the possibility of the birth mother changing her mind about this whole adoption stuff, could happen...there has got to be hurt anyway in some of these birth parent(s) minds...hurt that's being drudged up again due to DNA testing....
I know, I for one, wouldn't want to, in a sense, relive my relinquishing/abandoning of my infant, all over again!
UGH!!! COME ON PEOPLE, THINK!
Ok, so I also know that there have been some pretty sick stuff going on in Vietnam...unethical adoptions...I know this is the reason for the DNA testing...but as I've said before, Couldn't this DNA testing be done, PRIOR to the child being referred to a loving, waiting, wanting family? hmmmm...who knows...just simple thoughts, from a simple, frustrated mom...
Anyone wanna enlighten me a little bit more?
Tanner,

Mommy loves you!!! I will fight for you!! I will never give up!! I'll never lose faith, I promise! Hold tight, my angel...

Love Always,

Mom